Loneliness

Week 40, the National Week Against Loneliness. With hesitation, I attended a lunch organized by the Network Utrecht Science Park Inclusive. Was it really worth my time? 

I ended up sitting at a table with five colleagues. Three of them worked in the same department and knew each other. The others met for the first time. One of them was talkative and led the conversation: “Had we ever been lonely?” He shared the struggles of not having a partner and how he dealt with having autism. Because he opened-up about himself, a widowed lady at the table shared what loneliness meant for her. She had children, but it would be nice to go to the movies with a significant other, sometimes. Then her colleague shared he had autism, but how he felt included, partially because his colleagues reinforced his strengths. 

I wondered if mentioning to colleagues that you have autism, leads to a different treatment, or being labeled? They both mentioned that it is part of your identity, and that you only mention this, if you have accepted yourself.
I was surprised about the depth of the conversation. 

Two colleagues had a brown skin tone, and the conversation shifted towards how the Dutch treated them because of this. “I was never aware of it, I never felt different, only when we started to discuss Zwarte Piet”, said one. “In the past, one of my colleagues at this institution mimicked my accent”, mentioned the other. “I felt I needed to stand-up for myself, and I did. Sometimes you wish that others stand up too.” 

When I left the lunch, my question was answered: a good time-investment. 

And two people from our table exchanged information to go to the movies together.